This blog is a part 1 of a 3-part series of prayer letters between a student and God. Each blog follows the student throughout her 3 years at university and highlights some of the same prayers and questions you may have.
I’ve been here a couple of months now and I’m starting to feel more at home… slowly. Everyone told me to find a church when I got here - I’m glad I did. I’ve made friends, not best friends, but they are a lot of fun. I laugh a lot when I’m with them. I’m looking after myself, eating all the right things and drinking some of the wrong things… but I suppose you know that.
There have been times where I’ve felt further away from you than before, but I know you’re not far away. Thanks for sticking around even when I forget to talk with you or get carried away with this newfound independence. It’s weird being in complete control of my schedule, when I go to bed, what I eat, whether or not I go to lectures. Sometimes I think it was easier when I didn't have the choice, but I know that you love it when I choose the best things for me - I guess that’s how you raised me, with a choice.
When I feel far away from you, I read your letters. They remind me of how much you love me and how you have fought for me. I’m sorry for the times where I forget what you’ve done for me and try to do this year on my own. I’ve been telling my friends about you and some have even read your letters! Sometimes it’s weird because they think they’re going to offend me by asking to see them, but I love telling them about you! A lot of them don’t know their Dad, so I feel really fortunate when I help them to get to know you a bit better.
They have lots of questions about you which I try my best to answer, but to be honest, I don’t know what to respond a lot of the time! Because I’ve known you my whole life, there are lots of questions that I’m asked that I’ve never thought about before. To tell you the truth, I’m finding that quite difficult. Sometimes they lead me to question myself and my own memories with you. Perhaps that’s just part of growing up. Maybe as I get older, our relationship will change and I’ll learn more things about you. I’ll probably have questions about you. You always told me to come to you if I’m worried or anxious, or even if I have doubts about you. I remember you saying you’d much prefer that than I stop coming to you altogether.
When you write back, can you help me with some of the questions that my friends are asking? I love telling them about you, but I’m new to this, and I’m gonna need some help.
Thanks for everything Dad.
Love you x